Bob Goldman
What do 5 million people have that you don’t have?
A podcast.
That’s right! Based on data from January 2024, there are more than 5 million podcasts available for your listening pleasure.
And who is listening to all these pods?
That would be 47 percent of the American public over 12 years old, according to Forbes, as of January. You know what this means: Unless you’re working for a 11-year-old, or want to be, a podcast could be the missing ingredient you need to attract attention, incite promotions and garner lucrative job offers.
What do you need to start a podcast, besides a microphone and an extension cord?
You need a subject, and that, you’ve got in spades. The subject of your podcast will be you — wonderful, complex, needy little you. What you’re thinking. How you’re feeling. Why is everyone out to get you?
Once you have a subject, you also need someone to say it: a host. Actually, you probably need two hosts, since many podcasts present themselves as conversations. The co-star concept is an entertainment tradition, and if you doubt it, ask Heckle and Jeckle. (Don’t scoff. Those talking magpies could give Joe Rogan a run for his money.)
Most important of all, with 5 million pods competing with you for attention, your podcast will need a catchy name. The podcast industry makes that very easy. Using the free, AI-powered Name Generator from podcast facilitator Riverside, I was able to produce six can’t-miss names — three for podcasts that focus on getting you promoted and three for podcasts that focus on getting you hired.
If you’re podcasting to get a new job, the name generator recommends “Let’s Make This Work for Me.” While this approach sounds a little self-centered, it is reasonable, since anyone who offers you a job will soon learn that it certainly won’t work for them. Another AI-powered rec is “Why Do Girls Cheat on You.” This made little sense to my feeble human brain, but if it resonates with you, go for it. The final recommendation was my personal favorite: “Let’s Get Weird.” Considering what it’s like to work with you, “Let’s Get Weird” sounds like a winner.
If the goal of your podcast is to get promoted in the job you currently have, the name generator suggestions include “Mr. Lazyboy,” which may be too true for comfort. “Ninja for Hire” would serve as a good name for a pod chronicling your bold initiatives to move the company forward, if there were any. This leaves my personal favorite: “Waffle with Dora & Me.” I have no idea what this means, but if AI says it’s right, it must be right, right?
Now that you’ve picked a name, you’re good to go. What will you say in your pod? That depends.
No. 1: Podcasting about the job you have.
Despite the major blunder they made in hiring you, there must be other trouble spots that you see but top management doesn’t.
A good way to approach these malignant areas is to create a podcast that takes a helpful, positive, Q&A approach, with episodes such as “The lowdown on accounting hijinx,” “Why is the dullest department the most whack?” or “Too little work for too much pay. Welcome to marketing.” (The episode of your podcast that details your manager’s affair with the head of HR is sure to win a Webby. Don’t worry about having no evidence. You’re not Sherlock Holmes.)
In addition to pointing out the deficiencies of everyone in the company — except positive, caring you — your podcast can also be used to highlight management figures who could accelerate your climb up the org chart. You don’t want to be obviously fawning, but there could be an episode with a hard-hitting title, such as “Senior VPs who deserve a hug” and “One more reason to love our CEO.”
No. 2: Podcasting about a job you want.
As a job seeker, your podcast should feature the unique advantages you offer to anyone who would hire you. Since true-crime serials are very popular, your first season, “Don’t Rock the Boat,” will dramatize how, when faced with opportunities for out-of-the-box thinking, you always embrace an in-the-box-stapled-shut-sealed-tight-with-packaging-tape solution. You can use the second season of your pod to dramatize your slavish support of your managers, no matter how misguided they are, and highlight your willingness to rat out your closest friends at work when you see any signs of independent thinking.
Bottom line: With 5 million podcasts and counting, the world may not need another podcast, but you do.
Bob Goldman was an advertising executive at a Fortune 500 company. He offers a virtual shoulder to cry on at bob@bgplanning.com.
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